Fading Fast

Man am I ever burnt and I just came off vacation!!! HA!! Ah its ok....its a different kind of tired. I am being challenged. Once I have resolved it I will be back.

I was lifting weights Wednesday and just reflecting on the last couple years (that have gone by quite fast) since I returned to Jesus. I remembered the difficulty of being made new in my heart yet I had all this garbage/baggage to shed from many things I was wrapped up in away from God. I was aware of the scripture that talks about we reap what we sow. Just because one turns their life over to God does not exempt that law from working. And so I knew that I needed to focus on sowing good in spite of the trouble I was shedding from old bad seed. My hope was eventually the good fruits would outweigh the bad. In my reflection Wednesday I knew that I still have some things I am shedding but that things are so much better. The good sowing is reaping HUGE benefits and is like compunding interest!

I am reminded of the following scripture:

Romans 12:2
"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."

So with this I am really expecting some new vision of my future to unfold here. My roots are being drawn deeper. I have said this before on my blog but I have to say it again. I used to wonder what Pastor Dewayne Repass really meant when I asked him how he was doing. He would always said "With Jesus, life just keeps getting better and better!". As much as I knew Dewayne was and is the real deal, a great person who I was fortunate to be around those words just landed on me like a bunch of BUNK! A bunch of positive thinking or just a facade to avoid saying that life just SUCKED!!!

Now I know what he really was saying. He was not kidding. He was right. With Christ life does keep getting better and better and more exciting. That is not void of tough times. That would be a lie. I am reminded of another scripture verse:

Romans 8:28
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

This proves to be true.



On another note I am learning a bunch about really how I am wired musically. I am seeing what I really want to do more and more. I am seeing more and more what I am not meant for as well. I am sure over the next year this is really going to continue as I learn what I should be about doing. I am getting ready to completely pull the plug on GuitarPsycho....it has been dormant for some time. I figure I need to be spending more time being a musician and applying the principles in my own playing more than teaching. I know its a phase for me but I am going with it. I have also cut my teaching down to 2 times a month....in half......so I can focus more on my own playing and recording.

I have never been more fullfilled by just writing/composing and playing my own music completelty free from distraction. No agenda but just pure creativity. I continue to learn more about mixing and getting sounds, how to put together instruments etc. I have a LONG way to go but progress if taking leaps and bounds. I am reconsidering the tone of my CD as I think my style has been developed around my limitations. I am looking at how I can overcome the limitations and instead of building a CD around them creating music that I really want to create not just settle for what I am naturally good at now.

We'll see. I give it time..........but I think you can expect a heavier sound in some ways. Some of the stuff I am toying with sounds very much like movie soundtracks from action movies......a lot of heavy rhythm..........abrasive lead guitar and bumpin beats.....with symphony like orchestration.......lets just say this style has some balls. While listening and tweaking a song tonight I could see scenes that it could work with and the changes in the music are timed well.....a lot of changes...a lot of dynamics and surprises. Not your typical music. Not your typical guitar music. I really dont care if anyone will like it....well maybe I do a bit but point is I need to care more about doing what I enjoy and this stuff is like serious drugs for me.......

I wonder how I will be able to give all this back. How will I be able to go outward....and serve others with this?

Anyway I should hope to have something I am ready to share here in the next month or so. When I do I will definatelty post here for it.


God Bless,
Randy

Time of Prayer and Listening

I have been getting a very strong message lately in my prayers........to spend more time in the Word and Silence. If I would do that some of the questions that I have had unanswered and other stresses would be resolved. So I have listened. This time started with my mother passing a Creflo Dollar CD to me on Gods Direction not realizing how significant that was just for my situation (who knows...with moms sometimes the do realize). So I have started with that.

Talk about being shot right between the eyes!!!

Some when they are first born again talk about how much peace they have and that the prescence of God is very strong and noticeable...........that was also my experience and that experience lasted a few years..........then came some dry times.

But know this...............I have been drawn back into that place again......and man is it ever sweet. There is absolutely NO experience I have ever had that beats being in God's prescence.
Randy

Catch up

Well........ play a little catch up here:

Julia and I got back last night from Sarasota where we spent the week. Man I need to move to Florida. I know I could move right away but its just not time yet. The energy in Florida is much more agreeable with me. Cincinnati depresses me.

Anyway enough of that. A major highlight of that trip for me was that I was able to see a friend I had not seen in about 20 years. RJ. He was a roomate of mine in college in Lake Wales. Its weird how you can be pretty close to someone and just kind of drift away. Anyway we got together for lunch and caught up a bit. He is doing great. I was very happy to get together and look forward to getting back together next time I head down to FLA.



I keep progressing in speed slowly and surely on the guitar. In other areas, as I develop towards the profession, as I continue to spend more time under Tom Hess's mentoring I am seeing a lot where I still need to fine tune my focus.....even more. I have also seen where some of my goals are premature and that I could be focused on more productive things. I take this all as good because I would have never known if I had not set my head to learn all I can and hit the path...so no regrets. Bottom line of all of this. I am working at what I am meant to be working at and because of it I am at peace and fullfilled. I am doing what I was created to do.

I am beginning to move into another major time of spiritual growth here in the next month or so. I am starting to get pretty good at sensing when a move is happening and I can tell again. You know what that means? Well in this case? It will be pain! Hey sometimes in order to get better you have to undergo surgery, you have to endure the pain of the knife! God does not put you completely out either. It all happens while awake. It's all a part of the process and its all good. He promises not to give us more than we can bear.

More on what is happening there later, I have an idea what is going on.....

Later,
Randy